I hear it all the time.
“How can I be the best me? I have so many things against me, Tony. You don’t understand what I’ve been through/going through/my family/ my partner/my work/my responsibility/ my stress/ the pressure/ my life……………………….”
Congratulations, you have resistance.
Congratulations, you have resistance.
Why is that congratulations?
It means you are moving. The only things that don’t have resistance are dead. The sheer fact that you are moving requires resistance. To move one way will always have contrasting forces. To move one way towards greatness, you will have forces against you. That we understand. To move one way, requires resistance in the opposite way. That’s a universal law. We cannot fight that.
These forces at times will seem insurmountable. And often that’s when we stop. But it’s validation.
And standing here today, is testament to your 100% success rate. You are still standing, still surviving. What you have encountered you have defeated, you are still standing and you should be congratulated for that. You have survived that resistance.
And that’s the law of resistance. Coach Curl style.
Let us not be confused with the Law of Resistance, with all of its formulas and detail, that provides the basis of electric generation. Let us also acknowledge the Law of Resistance that fits within the Law of Attraction mode, the one that says we resist at times the very things that we wish to attract because it is not our primary focus. Two very valuable laws but nowhere near as valuable as this one to create the very best you.
The Coach Curl Law of Resistance is a validation tool. It validates our journey and reinforces our direction. But to fully allow the law to work, we must continue on our path. If we choose to turn back from the resistance, it then conspires to hold us in a resentful and unhappy pattern on existence, not living. It is only when we push through that resistance do we live in that state of significance, the significance of chasing your best life, the best YOU.
Allow me to illustrate. A number of years back, I undertook a change in wellness and healthy living and a result lost 20 kilograms over a six-month period. I took charge of the way I lived, what I ate and regulated coping strategies that allowed me to bring about physical change. After a while that change became noticeable amongst friends and colleague and the compliments flew. For a short time.
Then the resistance came.
And it came hard. Instead of compliments, I started hearing comments like:
- How much more weight do you want to lose?
- Surely you are still not on a diet?
- You look good the way you are now, don’t lose any more weight. You will be too skinny.
- I’ve seen AIDS patients look better than you. (my personal favourite)
The resistance says more about the other people than it has ever said about me. Through my discipline and desire, I challenged people to their very core, I had them feeling inferior based on my results and as a consequence, they desired the status quo to return.
And if I had listened to the resistance, that exact same thing would have happened. A return to the status quo, a return to an unhealthy life and an unhappy me.
Instead, that resistance validated my results and the results, and the motivation from them, kept me moving forward, pushing against the barriers and burst through the other side. It’s tough, but when you crash through it’s worth it. Because the other side is a beautiful thing. You start building a vision for yourself and that vision becomes the primary motivator. And that’s powerful.
That vision and continuing motivation brings momentum. When you hit the momentum, a beautiful thing happens. Habits form, motivation increases, results continue. Change becomes easier.
Resistance is good, whenever you attempt change for the better in your life, to move onwards from your current situation, you will face resistance. Congratulations for that. Pat yourself on your back.
Beware resistance is a sneaky thing. The obvious stuff is external, the less obvious is the stuff that goes through your own head. The self-talk that challenges you, tries to persuade you to stand down, to take the path well-traveled and comfortable with.
Don’t try and reason with your internal resistance. Instead, vision it out of existence by visualising the life you want and then feeding that emotion with action. Create energy around your vision and that energy will over-ride the negative energy that potentially occurs with your own doubtful self-talk. Channel your energy to where it’s best used, to overcome the internal resistance we feel and build your better job.
Falling victim to an internal hatchet job doesn’t serve anyone well.
The only thing you build sitting on the couch is your “bum groove”. The only thing you build when comfortable in a life that you have accepted is resistance to your dreams and goals and acceptance for what you have settled for.
So again, congratulations. If you are feeling resistance to positive change, that’s awesome. That is the world validate you are on the right path. Everything worthwhile is only achieved after pushing through resistance.
Validate your direction, verify your results. Make resistance work for you by motivating you to continue the path you are on, to continue the journey to your very best. To continue on to where you previously feared to go.
The equation I would like to share is the one that follows. Reflect back everytime you feel resistance attempting to persuade you from your path.
Life can be simple, it ain’t easy. So don’t take the easy option. Challenge the resistance, challenge yourself, become great.
Positive response to Resistance.
- Resistance felt = validation of results + renewed motivation + continued forward motion = momentum and continued results.
Negative response to Resistance
- Resistance felt = acceptance of resistance + wilting of desire + reduced effort to forward motion = loss of momentum and return to status quo or worse.
Congratulations, you have resistance. Simply, don’t let it win.
This article is an excerpt from “Seriously Simple Stuff to Get You Unstuck”, Coach Curl first book published in September 2016. Purchase your signed copy here.